Briana's Senior Prom

Briana's senior prom happened about a month ago, so it seems appropriate to finally blog about it. Heh.

 We went shopping in February and found it at Macy's...

It was the 4th dress she tried on and she fell in love with it. It fit her perfectly. I was worried about having to get the length altered because of the intricate train on it (I had Bri's junior prom dress altered and it was pricey with no train), but Bri had very high heels she could wear, it didn't have to be altered and it worked out perfectly. 

We had no particular dress color in mind when we went looking. We were just avoiding red because Bri knew her friend Andy (who she was going with) already had a red dress. I didn't picture B picking a black dress, but dang, this dress was perfect for her. Just beautiful.

Bri told me she wanted to wear her hair up this year. That was way above my ability, so we got a referral to have her hair put up that morning. Her stylist Heidi did an amazing job...

 

Bri chose to do her nails and makeup on her own.

My parents came over to see Briana in her dress and I am so mad at myself for not getting a picture of them with her that day. I was a little scatterbrained!

I did manage to do a nice photo shoot of Briana before we headed over to Andy's grandparents' house to take pictures of both girls. I know I am B's mom and I am super biased, but she looked like a movie star to me that day. She was breathtaking!

Here are some of my favorite photos...

 

 

It was chilly that afternoon when the wind started to blow, so I would go and hug on Briana until the wind died down. Doug took some pics - heh...

 

My parents headed home and we headed over to Andy's to take photos of the girls and to drive them to dinner (Andy looked so beautiful)...

 

 

Since it was just the two girls, it didn't make sense for them to rent a car for the evening. It is so expensive for two people. And, the girls didn't want to drive themselves in their long, fancy dresses. So, Doug and I offered to be their chauffeurs for the evening - and we made it into a date night for us.

We drove the girls to Rays On The River for a fancy dinner...

We dropped them off and headed to a different restaurant for dinner. Briana is always so sweet to text me lots of pictures of her experiences...

Their dinner looked amazing...

Once they finished dinner, they took some pictures outside the back of the restaurant which has lovely lake views...

They texted us to come get them, and we picked them up and then headed to the prom venue.

 

The girls going into the venue...

 

Briana sent me a lot of pictures of the fun she was having...

 

Yes - there was some crowd surfing that evening - LOL!

 

This year's venue was SO much better than last year's venue. The previous venue felt like a nightclub where this one felt like a true event complex.

 

The girls stayed for several hours at the prom and then it was time to head out - they were tired and their feet hurt! Ha!

 

While Bri and Andy had their evening out, Doug and I had our own date night.

 

While the girls ate at Rays, we found this little, quiet, retro pizza place which was truly delish...

And when the girls were dancing the night away, Doug and I went to a nearby Barnes and Noble and sat in the quiet Starbucks area. Doug snapped this photo of me (I can't believe I am posting it.) I had not been feeling well for weeks, but I wasn't going to miss out on this special night. And I was getting pretty tired toward the end of the evening. But I was so proud of myself for going out and actually having a nice evening with my hubby...

 

I am so happy that my introverted girl put herself out there once again and had a great time. And I am always shocked at how many kids she takes pictures with at her proms (and she said she didn't get to take pictures of everyone she ran into that night). So I really don't have to worry about her having friends - she has plenty of friends. It gives me hope that she will find good friends when she attends SCAD.

Here is a picture of Bri in junior prom dress and in her senior prom dress...

Two very different style dresses but both really beautiful. I do feel like Bri has matured so much in just a year.

So that was Bri's successful prom night. I still have a lot of things to blog about, so stayed tuned. I'll be back soon.

Struggling

 

It's been over a month since I have blogged. Since I blogged last, Bri attended her senior prom and received her graduation cap and gown. We celebrated St. Patrick's Day and Easter. We saw a partial solar eclipse. We also went to New York City for spring break.

 

Also since that time, I have been to doctor after doctor after doctor - trying to figure out all the things that are wrong with me physically. I have so many things going wrong with my body - stomach issues (reflux and heartburn), back, hip and shoulder muscle pain, heel pain (still - from back in Sept), blood pressure issues and through the roof anxiety.

 

I have had numerous blood tests and imaging tests (and still trying to get them). I've had some struggle with insurance and also getting appointments in a decent amount of time. The medical system in the USA just sucks all around.

 

I always wonder if I overshare too much of myself or wonder if anyone even wants to hear me complain about my ailments *again*. Honestly, I am tired of listening to myself. I have kept kind of quiet about what is going on, but I just can't sit quietly anymore. I just feel like sh*t a lot of the time and I just want to be open and honest about it.

My biggest issue is my stomach and I really need an endoscopy, but due to multiple factors, I am having to wait a long time to get one. I am quite sure the NSAID med that I was told to take for a number of months for my heel and knees jacked up my stomach. But, I am actually going to get second opinions next week for both my stomach and my heel, and hopefully I can get better wait times for testing and maybe some new answers with new doctors. Fingers crossed. It has been beyond exhausting.

I have ruled some things out when it comes to my health - which is good thing. But, I am obviously still really worried about why I am feeling so dang crappy all the time. I've lost 15 pounds in two months due to altering my diet, drinking a ton more water and just plain anxiety. My anxious mind goes to bad places (worst case scenario stuff) - it is just how I am wired. Feeling so icky and anxious puts me into a frozen mental state that I just can't seem to crawl out of. I hate feeling scared/unsure. I do the necessities of life, but then I crash afterward and go into a zombie kind of mode. So things like blogging, shopping, hanging out with my friends - have gone out the window. I was lucky I made it to NYC (and I did have a good time) - but I almost didn't go.

I honestly don't know what I would do without Doug. He is my rock. I know I can be A LOT and I try to acknowledge that to him often. And Bri is such a good kid - I don't have to really worry about her. It allows me to focus on myself when I really need to.

On top of all of the medical stuff, my only child is graduating in one month and there is a lot of end school of year/going to college stuff going on. Then she will head out in September on her new adventure. I am going to miss her so dang much. So not only am I dealing with my physical stuff, I am dealing with a ton of emotional stuff too. And I wish I felt better during the last few months before Briana heads to SCAD.

So that has what has been going on lately. I feel like I am a defective mess. I've cried way too much lately. I'm only fifty, but I feel much older at this moment - and I hate it. I desperately want to get my regular life back.

I am going to try to pull myself out of this funk and attempt to blog a bit soon. I hate going to all these doctor's appointments and I hate getting tests, but I have to get some more help and some answers. If you don't mind - say a prayer for me or send some good juju or think happy thoughts for me.

 

Sorry to unload on you all again. Hoping for sunnier skies soon.