63 Weeks Behind Us (Weekly Update)

63 weeks behind us since coronavirus hit the state of GA full force. 

Just a few more weeks of counting.

Our family will continue to be as careful and vigilant as possible when it comes to the virus until Bri is fully vaccinated. We haven't come this far to let our guard down now.

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So, last week was all about wrapping up school for Briana. She had a couple of finals to study for and complete. As you know by my last post, she finished up her finals on Wednesday and got her hair done...

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Last Sunday, we decided to have a fun/relaxing day before Briana tackled her finals. We had a nice lunch out (in our car) and then we drove by the R@ck the Block season 2 houses. The show was taped in Georgia in the fall. We really enjoyed the show. It looks like two of the houses have sold (people living in them already) and two are still for sale. It was really neat to see the houses in person!

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Also last Sunday, we watched "The M!tchells verses the Machines" on Netf!lix. We were looking for something to watch and decided to give it a try. We had no idea if it would be good or not. It ended up being so funny and entertaining! It was a very pleasant surprise...

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One morning last week, I decided to sit on my upstairs screened porch (with my furry partner in crime) and enjoy the quiet before the start of summer break. Once the kids are out of school, things do get a bit noisier in the neighborhood...

It was quiet for a little while and then someone decided to start sawing something nearby and that was the end of that unfortunately. It was nice while it lasted.

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To celebrate Briana finishing up school, Doug and I brought Briana to The Melting Pot on Thursday evening. It was only our second outing to an inside restaurant since the pandemic started. We chose a week night. There are lots of partitions and separation between booths, so we felt like it was a safe place to visit. Our booth was enclosed on three sides. Bri had been asking for The Melting Pot for the longest time. After all her hard work and all her sacrifice this past school year, she definitely earned a nice fondue dinner at one of her favorite places...

We had the sweetest waitress. She asked us if this was a special occasion and we told her yes. She wrote a congratulatory message to Bri in chocolate (the best kind of message). Bri was so happy to finally get melted cheese, steak and lobster tail and melted chocolate. Totally worth the wait.

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Yesterday (Saturday), Briana's favorite virtual school teacher Mr. H (World Geography) came by our house to meet Bri in person and give her some food goodies. He contacted the parents of his hardest working students a few days before and asked if he could swing by on his "thank you tour." He and his sweet daughter drove around all day on Saturday visiting students and giving them goodie bags. He is one of the nicest and most dedicated teachers Bri has ever had. Bri is really going to miss him and his class. She drew him a digital silhouette picture of the Arc de Triumphe in Paris as an appreciation gift. I could tell he was really touched when she gave it to him. (Masks were removed shortly for picture purposes!)

Here are some pics...

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Also yesterday, Bri, Doug and I watched Cruella on Disney+. It was really good. The costumes were absolutely beautiful...

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As I was watching Bri getting ready for bed one evening last week, after all her finals were done, a wave of disbelief and sadness really hit me. B only has three years of high school left. She is going to be a sophomore next year. Time is going by too quickly.

The feeling was overwhelming in that moment.

She is my one and only. I waited for SO long to become a mom and now she is almost 15. I was so blessed to become her mom. She will be living in my house for just a few more years. I'm not ready.

I saw this picture and it resonated with me...

Briana is an amazing young lady, and luckily, she isn't trying to grow up too fast (for now). I won't push her to do so, especially after this crazy year we had. You only get to be a kid/teen once and that's what I want her to be. She will be an adult soon enough - having to do adult things and make adult decisions. I will give her a slight nudge if/when it is ever necessary, but I'm going to let her progress on her own terms. Adulting is overrated anyway.

 

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 Now that the pandemic is easing a bit, I know there are going to be people who think I should be able to just "jump back quickly" into my "regular" life again once Bri is vaccinated. I know I can't do that. Not seamlessly anyway. Not easily. I cannot "just get over," "put behind me," or "pretend" what happened/what people did over these last 15 months didn't happen. I don't view a lot of things/people the same way anymore. How could I?

 

 My family altered our lives drastically for a very long time - out of necessity. We wouldn't change any of the choices we made, but it was not easy. Doing the right thing isn't always easy.

 This pandemic was real and it did happen - whether people accept that or not. Over 594K deaths have occurred since the beginning of last year in the US alone proves that. Over 20K of those deaths happened in Georgia.

I still can't seem to let go of a lot of the disappointment and resentment I continue to feel. I am not overly concerned about getting the virus or giving it to someone else at this point since Doug, Bri and I are vaccinated. What I am feeling uneasy about is the basic re-entering of the life I had before the pandemic. I am more aware of things, a lot has changed and I do feel like a different person now. If any of you know of a good way for me to ease back into it, please fill me in.

  I know that I sometimes tend to repeat myself in these blog posts. I don't mean to, but writing really helps me sort out my thoughts. I am just trying to convey that even when this pandemic is considered "over," I will continue to deal with the ramifications of what happened for quite a while. It might be easier for others to "get over it" more quickly, but I don't think that will happen for me.

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I have been keeping informed about what is going on the world. Politics, world events, pandemic info, another mass shooting - but I just don't feel like talking about all crappy stuff in this post. Maybe I'll address some of it next week. 

Thanks once again for reading. Be back next week.

Last Day Of 9th Grade/Freshman Year

She did it. She's done. I am so freaking proud of this kid.

Bri just finished her last final and she is officially done with her freshman year. This crazy, unbelievable, virtual year. 

This year ended with no bells and whistles. No award ceremonies (isn't done for 9th graders in this county). No hoopla. We are just ending quietly and happily. Briana completed her 9th grade year with all A's. She worked really hard.

Bri thrived virtually and I am so grateful for that. I know virtual learning is not "one size fits all." She did  well thankfully, but I cannot say there weren't hiccups, frustrating days, communication gaps, mistakes made, etc. It is hard learning through a computer screen for over a year. And she socially distanced throughout all of it - during a pandemic. She definitely sacrificed a lot this past school year.  I cannot begin to tell you how proud I am of her getting through all of it and doing it with unbelievable grace in the process.

 Here is Bri on her 1st day and last day of 9th grade...

And here is my girl over the years (1st and last days of school)...

Kindergarten and 1st grade...

2nd grade and 3rd grade...

4th grade and 5th grade...

6th grade and 7th grade...

 

8th grade and 9th grade...

To celebrate the last day of school, Briana got a new summer do...

A bit shorter with layers and some wave. She is SO happy with it!

Doug, Bri and I are delighted that Briana will be going back to school regularly in August. It's time for her to get back to her teenage life.

So proud of you my sweet girl. Hello summer break! Sophomore year - here she comes!!!!

62 Weeks Behind Us (Weekly Update)

 62.

62 weeks behind us since coronavirus hit the state of Georgia.

62 weeks ago - the US became a drastically divided nation. Some believed they should alter their lives to stop the spread of a deadly virus and some didn't. 

The picture I posted above is actually kind of perfect for my feelings lately - a balloon about to burst.

Looking at this picture positively...my pandemic balloon is about to break, I will be able breathe a small sigh of relief and I won't have to write weekly updates about my pandemic life anymore. Doug and I are vaccinated. Bri is almost fully vaccinated now. She can go back to school in the fall. Coronavirus numbers are falling. We will travel again. We will go to restaurants again. We will see more people again. Things will start to feel more "normal" again.

Looking at this picture negatively...my pandemic balloon is about to break and I will have to figure out just how to live my life "normally" again - close to the way I used to live it. Face things/people I have been putting off because the virus kept me from doing so. Knowing I am slowly "emerging" from my pandemic life, when a lot of others around me never really experienced a true pandemic life. IMO, the belief system of "I can do what I want" intensified and extended the pandemic much longer than it should have gone and that's still so upsetting to me. And now, I have to try to live my "more normal" life again when I am just not feeling at ease (for a number of reasons that I have mentioned in previous posts). I really need to figure out how to let certain things/feelings go - which I am finding very difficult right now. And there are some things that just can't be the same again. Moving forward will be quite tricky for me.

As you can see, my feelings are very mixed at the moment. It is difficult to explain that feeling of being happy/hopeful yet unhappy/uneasy at the same time...

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Last Thursday, I met my friend Kathy at the St@rbucks we always met up at before the pandemic...

 She was my very last "restaurant/coffeehouse" date before life changed so drastically due to the pandemic. Neither one of us hadn't visited there since March of 2020. Customers still cannot sit inside, but there are a number of tables set up outside. You walk inside to order (this St@rbucks is located in a strip mall). K and I saw each other one other time last June, but that was the last time we were able to connect in person.

 We gave each other the biggest, longest hug when we finally saw each other again. We snagged a great table in the shade and talked for several hours - just catching up. It felt really good to have a "normal" morning out in the world again. The weather was beautiful. You really do appreciate things more when you aren't able to have them for a while.

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Look at my sweet furry girl. She is so happy and relaxed in this picture. I must say it's been a very long  time since I looked or felt this happy and relaxed. Unfortunately though, since Mei has been spending more time on the porches (since I cleaned them up), she has starting to "mow" again a bit. Some on her arm, some on her leg, some on her tail and some on her belly. Ugh - it is so frustrating. At least I know now that her overlicking has to be due to something outside. Her fur had been growing back nicely up to that point. When she goes in for a checkup soon, I'll have to address this issue again. At least it will be with a different vet this time.

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So, Briana has one more week to go in 9th grade. This upcoming week is finals week. She was able to exempt two exams, so she only has two to complete. She has one super easy assignment that is due on the last day of school (so ridiculous). Though she will probably finish her final exams at the beginning of the week, she won't be "officially" done until Friday. At that time, she'll become a sophomore. That's crazy, right?

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I could get into a long, deep conversation about politics right about now, but I won't. Honestly, I am just over all of it. I cannot wrap my mind around people trying to protect a dangerous insurrectionist in order to hang on to control/power or get back control/power. I cannot wrap my mind around people who try to suppress voting in order to stay in control/power or get back control/power. I cannot wrap my mind around people telling a big, fat, horrendous lie in order to stay in control/power or get back control/power. It is sick. It is moral-less. It is unpatriotic. It is lunacy. It is WRONG. 

I'll just leave it at that.

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I think that is all I have to blog about right now. Thanks for reading once again. Just a few more weeks of my "weekly updates." I'll continue to blog, just not continue to count! Heh.

Be back soon!

61 Weeks Behind Us (Weekly Update)

 61.

61 weeks since coronavirus hit the state of Georgia. 61 very long weeks.

But, I have some very, very, very happy news to report to you.

Briana is finally VACCINATED!!!! She was vaccinated on Friday...

I can finally start to breathe a sign of relief. It was an amazing day. It really was. Other than a sore arm, Briana has felt totally fine. #TeamPfizer

B's second shot is schedule for June 4th. I'm a little more worried about her feeling kind of icky after that one - hopefully not. When June 18th rolls around, our whole family will be fully and completely vaccinated. Woo HOOOOOO!!!

 Briana will now be able to go back to school in August and have some protection. And she will need it because so many people in my neck of the woods are choosing not to vaccinate. If the cov!d vaccines are as good as the experts are saying they are, vaccinated people have a very small chance of getting and/or spreading the disease.

Here is a map of the US showing which states are strongly vaccinating and which states "aren't so much"...

See how light Georgia is (basically the entire south)? It just solidifies that the mindset that Doug and I have doesn't really match the majority of where we live. So in the next few years, it will be time for us to move to "greener pastures." Get it? The greener states? I made a funny. Heh.

Speaking of Georgia, we are making news in so many other ways too.

I haven't spoken about politics in quite a while (I'm trying to limit that now), but so much happened in the last week, I just have to speak about it. (This is your warning.)

Well, MTG once again looks like a complete lunatic to the entire world. She is pretty much stalking AOC and has been for a few years apparently. It is scary to see someone so scarily unhinged representing Georgia...

Another GA "winner" for the week is Rep. Andr@w C!yde. Lunatic/liar/Tr@mp loyalist in office. He said the insurrect!on on Jan 6 was like a "normal tourist visit" at a U.S. House hearing. It is totally unbelievable...

Looks just like another regular day - right? Insanity.

My heart breaks for the officers who almost died that day and now have to deal with Republ!cans boldface lying about what happened...

What that a-hole C!yde said was disrespectful, dishonest, deceitful and just plain sick. We all saw with our own eyes what happened that day. 479 people have been arrested for the insurrect!on "so far." That isn't even everyone. It's just insane.

It scares me what the Republ!can party has become. The "rad!cal right" (Tr@mpists) have now fractured the entire party. The house minority kicked out L!z Chen@y to push forward their misguided, dangerous Tr@mpian agenda and also push the Big L!e...

It all seems so surreal sometimes.

One last thing I will touch on was the shutting down of the pipeline and the chaos it created. 

I honestly cannot understand the entitlement some people feel they have...

We have definitely become a "me, me, me" society. The pandemic really put a light on that as well. Look at these people hoarding gas. Shameful.

And I got super irritated when people started blaming B!den for what happened...

One thing that did make me laugh was this video a friend sent me...

I cannot say that Doug hasn't utter a few of these phrases. LOL!

Sorry if this weekly post is a bit snarkier than usual. I haven't been feeling the best. I had a few of my chronic ailments pop up and bother me last week, and it has made me feel a bit feisty...

Thanks for letting me get all that off my chest. Now I can go for a while (hopefully) without going all political again.

I'll be back next week with another weekly update. Just a few more of these to go!!!

Just Good Stuff (Mother's Day Update And Such)

Ok - so here is my more "uplifting" post for the week that you were all promised. :) Yes, this picture of me above is all "filtered up" because I decided not to get all gussied up on Mother's Day. I let Sn@pchat do the work for me - LOL!

 

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I had a very nice, relaxing Mother's Day weekend with those who are closest to me.

My actual Mother's Day consisted of a quiet lunch with Doug and Bri on the downstairs back porch, gifts from Doug and Bri, some quiet time for just me on my upstairs back porch, a movie in our basement theater and lobster rolls/cake for dinner...

Briana suggested "Hairspray" as our movie choice for the afternoon and I was good with that. Briana made me a pretty sun catcher and Doug bought me a spring-themed tray and coasters for my upstairs screened porch. The lobster rolls were as delicious as the ones last year and the cake was the bomb!

Listen to that popcorn pop. Like in a real movie theater!!!

Bri and I visited with my parents on the Friday before Mother's Day. We had an early Mother's Day get together. It's always good to spend some time with both of them...

My parents got me pampering goodies, and Bri and I (and Doug) gave my mom a picture that meant a lot to her.

I would say Mother's Day weekend was quite successful.

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I spend a whole lot of time sitting on my porches as you know. They are my safe place. My quiet place. My place to think. My place to enjoy nature without actually "being" in nature. LOL!

 

 I have to get it in my porch time before the Georgia humidity eventually chases me off of them. I enjoy when the sun starts going down in the evening and all my "glowy" items start to pop on. And my rose bush has gone berserk. It's so pretty. Blooms all over the place!

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These two...

Something really good that came out of this pandemic was the relationship bond between these two. They were always friends, but now they are super duper close. I know Mei will miss Bri so much when Bri goes back to school.

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Some super amazing news...Briana's age group is officially allowed to get vaccinated now. You all know how long I have been waiting for this. It's finally happening...

Briana has an appointment scheduled for tomorrow and we are beyond thrilled. Our family is so close to to resuming a more normal life. Though the normal for our family will definitely be different now. A lot of emotional damage has been done since this pandemic started. Damage that may or not be able to be repaired. I am going to need some time and space to figure out how I want to navigate life and relationships again. I will take it one day at a time. Once Briana is two weeks past her second vaccination - we will start testing some waters - safely. And at that time, I will stop the "counting" of the weeks on this blog that I have been doing since this whole thing started. I can't wait.

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Some more positive news ~ my physical therapy is going so well, my therapist has recommended me having sessions just once a week now. He has given me a lot of tools/exercises to do at home to help me keep my ear unblocked. I am not perfect, but I am so much better than I was. My ear barely blocks up now and when it does, I know what to do to try to unblock it. I honestly thought this was a full TMJ issue. It is really is more of a neck and shoulder issue. If I can strengthen my muscles some more, hopefully that will stop those muscles in my neck/shoulder from seizing/bunching up - causing my ear to block up.

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So, I think I will end on that note. Wish Briana good luck tomorrow. It's the day we've been waiting for!

30 Years Together

 

 30 years ago today, Doug and I went out on our first date together - the senior prom. 

We've had 30 years of happy times, sad times, good times and challenging times.

I'm so grateful he is "my person."

 

60 Weeks Behind Us (Weekly Update)

60 

60 weeks since the pandemic hit GA full force.

On a positive note to start off this post…I did have a lovely, quiet Mother’s Day weekend. I am so grateful to still have my mom in my life. I have a terrific kid. I have a wonderful husband. There is a vaccine on the horizon for Briana’s age group. Bri is almost done with 9th grade. My physical therapy is going pretty well. I am grateful for a lot of things. Life is ever so slowly starting to feel slightly more normal. (I plan to write a Mom’s day/other life stuff recap post later this week.)

So why do I feel so crappy still? I’m not in a great headspace. Please don’t tell me that I need more prayer in my life. I keep hoping to feel better (and I have “tools” that I am using to try to feel better), but I can’t seem to get there.  

There is just a lot of "stuff"  that keeps me in a consistent anxiety/depression mode and I cannot seem to shake it. It has been a really long time since I have woken up in the morning and felt completely at ease or free from worry. I’m always wondering what physical ailment might end up bothering me, who or what is going to upset/tick me off on any particular day or what "shoe is going to drop" next. It's tough.

On Saturday, a FB friend of mine posted that a FB friend of hers - a single mother with a teen daughter - sadly caught covid before she could get fully vaccinated. She is now intubated in the ICU and not doing well. Also on Saturday, I read from another FB friend that a relative of theirs died of covid. And yet, so many people still refuse to get vaccinated - which means this country will most likely never be able reach herd immunity. Yes, numbers are decreasing, but this virus could very likely stay around for good now. I’m tired of explaining that even if you are relatively healthy, this debilitating virus does not care. You can be healthy and still get very, very sick. This virus does not play. The singer P!nk rewrote her will when she got extremely sick from the virus, and she is the picture of health.

To add to my already high level of anxiety, my house cleaner broke my trust last Monday. She worked for me through a maid service and had been cleaning my house every other week for 10+ years. The owner of the company contacted me Tuesday morning to inform me she found my prescription steroids (with my name on them) in a dirty towel bag that my house cleaner had turned in the night before. I hadn’t even realized yet that they were missing. This type of steroid comes in a box with a sealed pack of meds inside. I was prescribed it for my ear issue about two months ago and placed it in my bathroom drawer for safe keeping. I actually had a difficult time getting them from my pharmacy after they were prescribed to me because steroids are in such high demand right now. I believe my house cleaner swiped the box from the drawer, threw it in her towel bag and then forgot to pocket it before turning the bag into the owner for cleaning.

I had a few issues with my house cleaner over the years, but nothing so severe that I felt I needed to fire her. Overall, she did good work - though I have to admit it hadn’t been quite as good the last couple of years. She always seemed to be dealing with bad luck/hard times and I always felt bad for her - which is maybe partly why I kept her around so long. After all the years of working for me, she had earned my trust. She did give me some static when the pandemic began about mask use and wearing gloves, and I had to nip that in the bud - which was definitely awkward. But, this was her biggest infraction by far. I told the owner that I didn’t feel comfortable having her clean for me anymore. The owner asked if I wanted to press charges and I said no.

When confronted by the owner by phone (and let go from the maid service), my house cleaner was adamant that I had “thrown the meds away” and she had found them in the trash. I absolutely did not throw them away - last I knew they were in my drawer. I do have a small wastebasket that sits back underneath my vanity where the drawer is located, but I cannot figure out any way the box could have unknowingly “fallen” in there. And hypothetically ~ why would someone even look in a box that was supposedly thrown in a wastebasket to see if there were drugs still inside? Despite that, she should never had taken a client’s prescription meds for her own personal use - no matter where she “says” she found them.

My (now former) house cleaner was so angry when confronted (and let go) via phone call, she cussed out the owner and hung up on her. It's something I never, ever pictured her doing. No remorse at all. I guess you don't really know people sometimes. Over 10 years - and that’s how it ended. My meds were delivered back to me and I have a new girl set to come in a couple weeks. I hope things go better from here. 

Honestly, I feel like the world has gone insane.

Since the pandemic started, my (now former) vet office “catnapped” my cat, I had to fire my (now former) hairdresser of 20+ years due to severe lack of professionalism and now - my (now former) house cleaner stole from me and lied about it. I don’t even know what to say anymore.

I live with a constant underlying frustration with the world - and it often overwhelms me. Things keep happening around me that keep solidifying the need for me to make some big changes in my life. I just need to figure out what my next moves will be.

Well, I actually think I am going to end this post here. Enough griping for today. I'll be back in a couple of days with a more uplifting post. Stay tuned.

24th Wedding Anniversary Recap

24 years of marriage...

Our anniversary celebration started on Saturday evening. Doug and I had been talking for quite a while about whether or not we were ready to eat at a restaurant again. As you know, he and I are both fully vaccinated now, but Bri isn't yet, so we were trying to decide what was best. We knew if we were going to eat out for the first time in over a year, it was going to be at one of our very favorite restaurants. And, we knew Bri was definitely going to join us. There was no way we were going to venture out for the first time without her - anniversary or not. The restaurant isn't open on Mondays (our actual anniversary was on Monday), so we opted to go there on Saturday.

Doug called and made a reservation and explained to the hostess that we were eating out for the first time since February of last year. We thought about eating outside at first, but realized it could get a bit warm. So instead, we wanted a table kind of away from everyone inside. She assured us she could do that and told us the restaurant had installed clear plexiglass between all the booths. All the wait staff still wears masks. We felt comfortable with that.

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 We decided to get a bit dressed up for the occasion since it has been so long since we had done something like this. Briana had a pretty dress that she has picked out for her 8th grade dance last year - a dance that was cancelled due to Covid. It had been sitting in her closet for close to two years (she got it at the beginning of 8th grade). She wasn't sure when she'd get a chance to actually wear it, so she decided to wear it to our dinner. She looked so pretty in it...

She fell in love with this dress the minute she saw it. And the fact that it has pockets sealed the deal the day we bought it.

Hopefully she will find another occasion to wear it again.

This was my outfit for the evening...

I hadn't worn heals in forever and I felt like I had to learn to walk in them again!

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We had a 5:30 reservation, and the restaurant was just beginning to fill up...

They sat us at a u-shaped table that was next to the door that led to the patio and a window and we were distanced nicely from the other tables...

The 3 of us...

You can see the plastic partition behind Doug and Bri - separating us from the next table.

Doug and I ordered some wine...

Our waiter's name was Jozsef and he was so nice. Great service!

We started with a fried lobster tail appetizer...

And some bread/crackers...

Doug and I split a lettuce wedge...

Then we ordered our main course - Doug and I both got spinalis and Bri went for a filet...

Jozsef offered to take a picture of us with our meal...

 

Since it was our anniversary, we got a free dessert and Doug and I picked cheesecake...

 

Briana got a skillet cookie and was in heaven...

She had been craving this for so long.

So, our first trip back to a restaurant went very, very well. It went exactly how we hoped it would go. And we felt quite comfortable (for me surprisingly so) - which was really nice. It was a great way to very slowly dip our toes back into the restaurant waters.

It might be a while before we attempt it again and it will have to be the right restaurant, but we look forward to eating out again!

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Yesterday was Doug's and my actual anniversary. And it thunderstormed - all. day. long. Rain from morning until night...

I caught some thunder on video...

My gift from Doug (opal for 24 years)...

I got Doug a mini fridge for his office!

Sweet gifts from my parents...

Doug and I had a dinner date in the evening. We ate cheeseburgers in his Tesla as it was raining (thunderstorming) outside. LOL! Very different (a bit less glamorous) from our Saturday night, but still it was fun. We had a lot of laughs...

So that is the wrap up! We had a very nice few days. Next year is a big one! We went on trips for both 15 and 20, so I am guessing we will be traveling again somewhere for 25!