
This post is a little bit of a rant I guess. I don't often do this. I overheard a conversation today that really bothered me. I wasn't trying to overhear it, it was very loud and in a public place, so there wasn't a way I couldn't hear it. I don't know why I am surprised by the conversation, so much of the world today feels like they are owed something.
There was a man talking to a woman. It was obvious that did not know each other before today, but the man and woman started up a casual conversation where the man revealed to the woman that his two little girls were adopted by him and his wife through the foster care system. The woman was fascinated by this and told the man that she had always wanted to adopt a child. She had a biological child and was pregnant with her second child (4 months along) but she really wanted to adopt too. She also said she had thought about fostering a child but was kind of scared by it because she might get too attached to a child that she might have to give back. She asked him if he had any contact information on fostering a child.
That part of the conversation was fine.
She then said that she would really like to bring a foster child into her home before her baby was born (remember, two seconds before that she said she wasn't even sure she wanted to be foster parent). The man was surprised a little and informed her that there were a lot of things that needed to be done before she could even be considered for the foster care program. It would probably be 12 months or more before a child could be placed in her home. There are background checks, medicals, classes, etc. Makes sense, right? I mean, most of the people reading this blog completely understand what you have to go through to adopt/foster a child. This woman was
floored by this revelation. She complained that she was a pediatric nurse and her husband was a neurosurgeon and they were good people. Then she said, "Do my husband and I both have to take the classes?" The man of course said yes - if you are married then you both need to take the classes. The woman scoffed again and said that her husband didn't have time to take classes. Wow...
For some reason, this woman felt she should be able to just foster a child with no questions asked. She didn't feel that she nor her husband needed to be taught anything about how to parent a foster child. Children coming from broken homes are special. They will most likely need special attention - physically and emotionally. I could feel the ignorance exuding from this woman. And her sense of entitlement absolutely astounded me. She was basically saying, "I want a child so just give me one." There is no doubt that this woman has no business adopting or fostering anybody. If someone is serious about fostering a child, he/she needs to MAKE the time to take the classes. And if you don't have time for the classes, how are you going to have time to raise another kid?
No one handed me Briana. I had to prove that I was worthy to parent a child. I didn't mind proving it. (Now keep in mind, I didn't like having to re-prove it over and over when the wait got so long, but I didn't mind having to prove it.)
In my opinion, she acted like fostering a child was like picking out a purse from the mall. Just pick it out and take it home.
This world is filled with so many people that feel they are owed something. So many people live beyond their means nowadays for instant gratification. When are people going to realize that the reward is so much greater when you have to work for it?