I'm Not Doing So Great

I have to be honest - I'm not doing so great. Life is overwhelming and I am kind of drowning right now.

I am overwhelmed in my personal life and with the state of the world.

I am not feeling great physically. On one positive note, my heel is actually doing much better. But all of the inactivity that I was forced to do at the end of last year has resulted in other things happening with my body. And now, I am unfortunately looking at another possible surgery to fix those things. I don't want to get into specifics, but it is upsetting. The thought of having another surgery after an already intense one is almost too much for me to process...

 

So I am dealing with that. 

 

There is also some other personal stuff going on in my life (not having do with Doug or Briana) that I can't talk about here. But let's just say it is life-affecting.

 

On the political front and state of the world, I will say that I am still very angry. That isn't strong enough word actually. 

 

Enraged is a better word for it.

I was first in line to admit that B!den was toast last year. Total decline. He could never have swung another 4 years at his age. I knew he should not be running in the last elect!on. I was happy he dropped out. But the other side...people looked at a 78 year old, dementia-ridden, criminally-convicted hate clown and said "Yep, that's the guy."

How???? Look at this buffoon. How could anyone think "THIS is THE guy to run it all freaking AGAIN"...

Our country is a laughing stock to the rest of the world. It is horrifyingly embarrassing.

This is literally how Dump answered a simple question the other day (actually READ it)...

He's always been intensely stupid, but this is next level.

And now he is getting increasingly dangerous. He was extremely dangerous before, but now he's even more so. Deport!ng people illegally, purposely manipulating the st@ck market, defying the Supreme Court, spending millions upon millions of taxpayer money for personal recreation, creating tarr!ff wars and fighting with our allies and invoking and emboldening more hatred than ever before. And I'm not just saying that - there are so many receipts. SO MANY.

Doug and I were driving down the street today and I saw this sign plastered on a small crappy used car dealership about 10 minutes from my house...

I saw it and felt physically ill. Once Briana is out of college, the housing market isn't complete crap and hopefully the a-hole is out of office, Doug and I will be going find a place that reflects our value system because it most certainly ain't here.

I am seeing now that a small percentage of people on the right are sort of slowly coming to their senses or are having some sort of remorse on their vot!ng decision (FAFO). But honestly, it only happened because it finally affected them personally. It is too freaking little and too freaking late. I said before the orange nightmare was elected that he would have no guardrails (no adults in the room) - and he doesn't. Just a bunch of rump-kissers. And pretty much everyone who I am connected to who voted for this has been completely silent about what is going on.

 

 People who voted for this and are hearing what is going on now (or not hearing it based on turning of the head or due to the propaganda they decide to follow) are either making a conscious decision to be willfully uninformed, are quietly regretting their decision or are sitting back and enjoying all the hate and chaos.

I will never stay quiet about any of this. It is too important...

Half this nation agreed that voting for an old 34 time conv!cted felon who led an insurrect!on was a better choice in November than a younger, experienced, highly educated black woman. It truly makes my heart sick.

 

Speaking of the insurrect!on, anyone remember all the people who screamed "Ant!fa" when the 

insurrect!on first happened? M@ga saying it loudly with an arrogant, puffed chest? They were lying and brainwashed. Obviously it wasn't Ant!fa because Dump p@rdoned all of those people in January - his supporters - after they bashed heads in and destroyed the Capit@l. So what happened to all those supposed Ant!fa people? They didn't freaking exist. Proof the narrative changes over and over and over again to defend one freaking wannabe d!ctator.

 

I am scared for my daughter - for a number of reasons. I don't trust anyone in this administration now. She has already had her decision-making ability over her own body stripped away. What else is next?

 

 It's only been 4 months. 4 horrid months. I don't know how to hold on for 4 years of this insanity. 

 

So yeah, I'm mad. And I don't feel good. And I am exhausted. And I am sad.

 

 So that is my update. Hoping I will be in a better frame of mind the next time I post. Time will tell.